Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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