Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess

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  (248): absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess http://tfl.nu/and5
  Replies (4) Good night (1597) Bad night (543)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.

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  (619): He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting. http://tfl.nu/l79o
  Replies (58) Good night (993) Bad night (3769)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.

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  (501): My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship. http://tfl.nu/h697
  Replies (56) Good night (931) Bad night (4936)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  meow

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.

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  (402): meow (1-402): WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD. http://tfl.nu/2v4y
  Replies (96) Good night (5097) Bad night (1512)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?

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  (440): my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that? http://tfl.nu/nj0k
  Replies (31) Good night (5646) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.

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  (905): Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes. http://tfl.nu/qzyp
  Replies (12) Good night (1025) Bad night (3926)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face

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  (479): yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face http://tfl.nu/63az
  Replies (23) Good night (3645) Bad night (1305)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.

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  (317): He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again. http://tfl.nu/2li2
  Replies (25) Good night (1004) Bad night (5262)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow

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  (402): I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow http://tfl.nu/h8bi
  Replies (10) Good night (1776) Bad night (4307)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.

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  (917): He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm. http://tfl.nu/al4b
  Replies (8) Good night (7283) Bad night (1509)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.

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  (250): I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out. http://tfl.nu/u7xj
  Replies (4) Good night (1216) Bad night (1483)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.

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  (407): I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom. http://tfl.nu/s7cn
  Replies (29) Good night (3800) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?

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  (774): Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is? http://tfl.nu/utv4
  Replies (7) Good night (1439) Bad night (460)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?

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  (503): So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you? http://tfl.nu/dh4l
  Replies (3) Good night (741) Bad night (404)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida

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  (917): Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida http://tfl.nu/8h2x
  Replies (2) Good night (348) Bad night (418)

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