The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
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