16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
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This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
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I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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