I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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