have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
The air taste purple.
Randomize
