what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
