I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
