He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.