Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background. http://tfl.nu/i9c0
  Replies (22) Good night (3353) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless http://tfl.nu/3wa2
  Replies (11) Good night (4381) Bad night (878)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself. http://tfl.nu/wwab
  Replies (45) Good night (968) Bad night (7244)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt

  (1-732): View more from New Jersey

  ..im mad u rememberd about that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt (1-732): ..im mad u rememberd about that http://tfl.nu/q0le
  Replies (14) Good night (1057) Bad night (3475)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero. http://tfl.nu/82jq
  Replies (16) Good night (7370) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat. http://tfl.nu/0ifj
  Replies (9) Good night (3648) Bad night (1792)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago. http://tfl.nu/hd48
  Replies (8) Good night (1139) Bad night (3327)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine http://tfl.nu/d0ou
  Replies (23) Good night (2982) Bad night (1419)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer". http://tfl.nu/vh03
  Replies (7) Good night (4441) Bad night (901)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible. http://tfl.nu/ozx2
  Replies (3) Good night (1679) Bad night (626)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven http://tfl.nu/tpek
  Replies (10) Good night (2069) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have http://tfl.nu/bm9z
  Replies (6) Good night (563) Bad night (1544)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy. http://tfl.nu/ym5a
  Replies (3) Good night (472) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM http://tfl.nu/pr8f
  Replies (3) Good night (880) Bad night (485)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home http://tfl.nu/h5b8
  Replies (1) Good night (664) Bad night (320)

Randomize