He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
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