You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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