My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize