Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize