Dual....:-)
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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