I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
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