I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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