biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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