3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize