More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
