i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
