I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
