Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
