I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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