I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Randomize