she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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