I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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