I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
