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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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