woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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