My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
