I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
