Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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