The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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