Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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