I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
