dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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