none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
