all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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