I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
