but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
