OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
