Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
