i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
How's work?
Spinning.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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