Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
