Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
