Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
My vagina is very pro this idea
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
