are you still at the devil's house?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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