you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
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