Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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