I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
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I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
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You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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