Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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