and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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